1,000 Best Cocktail Quotes and Instagram Captions (2023)

1. I prefer my espresso in a martini.

2. After work, we hit the gin

3. Take life with a grain of salt, a slice of lime, and a shot of tequila

4. I don’t have a drinking problem except when I can’t get a drink.

5. “I drink too much. The last time I gave a urine sample it had an olive in it. ” – Rodney Dangerfield

6. Rum away with me

7. You know what rhymes with Friday? Cocktail

8. When life gives you pineapples, make pina coladas

9. Technically it’s not drinking alone if the bartender is there.

10. “You say potato, I say vodka. ” – Karen Walker

11. I take my problems with a grain of salt, a slice of lime, and a shot of tequila

12. Choose happy…hour.

13. “It’s 4:58 on Friday afternoon. Do you know where your margarita is?” ― Amy Neftzger

14. Live every hour like it’s happy hour.

15. “You say potato, I say vodka.” – Karen Walker

16. “As endless as the ocean, as timeless as the tides.”

17. Every good story starts with happy hour

18. “There’s no absolutes in life, only vodka.” – Mick Jagger

19. Life is a crazy mixture of intoxicating cocktails

20. “Here’s to alcohol, the cause of — and solution to — all life’s problems. ” – Homer Simpson

21. “An intelligent man is sometimes forced to be drunk to spend time with his fools.” ~ Ernest Hemingway

22. Olive martinis so much

23. Friday nights are incomplete without the cocktail

24. “Drink like there’s no Monday.”

25. A slice of lemon and a glass of cocktail, tell me a better love story than this?

26. Cocktails are way cheaper than therapy

27. “Happy hour is the best hour.”

28. I prefer Tom Collins over Tom Cruise.

29. “I prefer my espresso in a martini.”

30. “Wine + Dinner = Winner”

31. I tried to say no to vodka, but it’s 40% stronger than me

32. “Everybody’s got to believe in something. I believe I’ll have another beer.”

33. Coffee keeps me going until it’s acceptable to drink champagne

34. Time flies when you are having a cocktail

35. Strong women need strong drinks.

36. 24 hours a day. 24 beers in a case. Coincidence? I think not

37. Don’t think about the cocktail, drink cocktail

38. “Here’s to good drinks, good friends, and great memories”

39. Beers too many more cheers

40. Use puns or wordplay to make your caption stand out

41. Let the evening be gin.

42. Be happy for this moment.

43. First drink, then let’s think about it

44. “Drink with a smile.”

45. Some call it arrogant; I call it confident.

46. It’s cocktail o’clock

47. “Happy Hour just got happier”

48. It’s beginning to look a lot like cocktails

49. Go where the Wi-Fi is weak, and the rum is strong.

50. “Here’s to a night filled with laughter and good drinks”

51. Alcohol is the liquid version of photo shop

52. “Cheers to a night of good drinks and good company.”

53. Reality is an illusion that happens due to a lack of alcohol

54. I have feelings about mixed drinks

55. Having some good old-fashioned fun!

56. “If life gives you limes, make margaritas. ” – Jimmy Buffett

57. When life screw u up get yourself a screwdriver.

58. I prefer my cocktails old fashioned

59. Tonight’s forecast? 99% of cocktails

60. Tequila may not be the answer, but it’s worth a shot

61. It’s cosmo o’clock

62. “Drinking and dancing the night away”

63. Gin and tonic, name a more iconic duo

64. “Martinis are the only American invention as perfect as a sonnet. ” – HL Mencken

65. “Scotch: Because one doesn’t solve the world’s problems over white wine.” ~ Anonymous

66. If you visit New York someday don’t ever forget to try the Manhattan delight

67. Eat, Sleep, Cocktail, Repeat.

68. “A slice of lemon and glass of cocktail, tell me a better love story than this?”

69. “The more I drink, the less there is for the kids to drink.”

70. You can’t buy happiness, but you can buy beer and that’s kind of the same thing

71. 24 beers in a case. Coincidence? I think not

72. Alcohol is the anesthesia by which we endure the operation of life.

73. It is my favorite time of the day

74. “Pork-fection on a plate.”

75. Sometimes I put a splash of orange juice in my champagne

76. Watch me sip, watch me lay lay

77. New rule: all drinks must come in coconut form

78. I wonder if there’s a margarita somewhere out there thinking about me too

79. “Hear no evil, speak no evil, and you won’t be invited to cocktail parties.” – Oscar Wilde

80. There is nothing which a glass of cocktail cannot solve

81. “Here’s to alcohol, the rose colored glasses of life. ” — F. Scott Fitzgerald

82. My doctor said I needed to drink more water, so I added ice to my whiskey.

83. There’s always time for cocktails.

84. “Life is too short for bad cocktails.”

85. “Step aside coffee! This is a job for alcohol!” – Unknown

86. High tide or low tide, I’ll be by your side

87. No need to cry over spilled tequila

88. “Cheers to the good life”

89. One drink away from telling everyone what I REALLY think

90. I’m a better person when I’m drinking piña coladas

91. “Here’s to good drinks and great friends.”

92. “Cocktails and sunshine, please.”

93. Sweeter than honey

94. Cry me a whiskey river

95. “Let’s get tropical.”

96. I don’t drink a cocktail, cocktail drinks me

97. Born to rum

98. If you visit New York someday don’t ever forget to try the Manhattan delight.

99. You’re negroni one for me

100. “Men are like wine—some turn to vinegar, but the best improve with age. ” —Pope John XXIII

101. “Cocktails always get high on girls.”

102. My favorite drink is the next one

103. Happy hour or better call it cocktail hour.

104. Happy hour?

105. Surround yourself with people who are more excited about your birthday than you are.

106. “Hit me with your best shot.”

107. “I drink to make other people more interesting. ” — Ernest Hemingway

108. Happy hour or better call it cocktail hour

109. Keep calm and make yourself a cocktail.

110. Drink responsibly – Don’t spill any.

111. When life gives you lemons, grab the vodka

112. “Cocktails and conversations, my favorite combo.”

113. I love the umbrella hanging on the top of the cocktail

114. “If I had to live my life over, I’d live over a saloon.” ~ W.C. Fields

115. I cook with wine. Sometimes I even add it to the food

116. The greatest adventures happen after cocktails

117. “Hanging with you is gin-credible.”

118. Write several drafts first

119. There is always a happy hour in your day. Make sure to have it

120. Time to become a superhero and rescue some wine trapped in a bottle

121. Yes, size matters. Nobody wants a small cocktail

122. Live every hour like it’s happy hour

123. “It’s always happy hour with good friends”

124. “Cocktails bring u the best taste swings.”

125. “Let’s drink to success.”

126. “My friends speak of my drinking…. but they know not of my thirst” ~ Anonymous

127. “For gin, in sober truth, supplies the fuel for flaming youth. ” – Noel Coward

128. Happy hour vibes.

129. Ask a question in your caption to encourage engagement with your followers

130. “I cook with wine, sometimes I even add it to the food. ” — W. C. Fields

131. Make happy hour last all day

132. “Cocktails, because adulting is hard”

133. Whiskey business

134. Bring on the bubbly

135. Alcohol is the liquid version of photoshop

136. Peace, love, and happy hour.

137. Life is better with a cocktail

138. “Drink up, it’s [insert day of the week here].”

139. “Keep calm and give yourself a cocktail. “

140. Did somebody say cocktails?

141. Hydrate responsibly.

142. “But why is the rum gone?”

143. “Confused about your feelings? , Have a blended shot to clear it out.”

144. “I prefer my Cocktail the old style.”

145. “There’s really no wrong way to use a margarita pool. ” – Will Forte

146. “Watch me sip, watch me lay lay” – Unknown

147. The more I think about you, the more I need to fill my empty glass of cocktail

148. “If you like piña coladas, and getting caught in the rain…” — Rupert Holmes

149. I’ll drink to that

150. “It’s a cocktail o clock.”

151. Gym? I thought you said gin

152. “Making Monday a little more bearable”

153. I stay hydrated by adding ice to my cocktail

154. My favorite book: Tequila Mockingbird

155. Never chase anything but drinks and dreams

156. The more I drink, the less there is for the kids to drink

157. “Trust me, you can dance. ” – Alcohol

158. A Lady, with a glass of cosmopolitan, defines Beauty with class.

159. Girls often prefer cocktails over, Ahem I guess u already know it

160. I’m in need of liquid therapy

161. “Work is the curse of the drinking class.” — Oscar Wilde

162. What’s the difference between a man and a margarita? A margarita hits the spot every time

163. An intelligent man is sometimes forced to be drunk to spend time with his fools

164. “He was a wise man who invented beer.”

165. Alcohol is the anaesthesia by which we endure the operation of life

166. Confused about your feelings? Have a blend shot to clear it out

167. Too much of anything is bad, but too many cocktails are just right.

168. “Cocktails, because sometimes wine is just not enough”

169. Feeling just peachy

170. “Drink and be merry”

171. Looks like this is a gin-gin situation

172. The first five days of the weekend are the hardest

173. Happy hour? Wine not?

174. I enjoy long romantic walks toward the bar

175. “She has a cocktail in her hand and confetti in her hair.” — Kate Spade

176. “Save water, drink wine.”

177. “Sip, sip hooray!”

178. Sip happens.

179. Champagne, if you are seeking the truth, is better than a lie detector

180. Darling, every hour is ‘happy hour’ when you are fabulous

181. Hit me with your best shot

182. My doctor said I needed to drink more water, so I added more ice to my cocktails

183. The more I think about you, the more I need to fill my empty glass of cocktail.

184. Tonight’s forecast? 99% chance of cocktails

185. “Uncork and unwind”

186. One tequila, two tequila, three tequila, floor

187. It’s a bubbly kind of night

188. I’m in a good place right now. Not emotionally, I’m just at the bar

189. Democratic Party, the Republican Party, Cocktail party

190. “I prefer Tom Collins over Tom cruise.”

191. “An intelligent man is sometimes forced to be drunk to spend time with his fools. ” – Ernest Hemingway

192. I enjoy long, romantic walks to the bar

193. Whiskey is a great drink? It makes you see double and feel single

194. It’s not as giant as James’ peach, but I like mine just fine

195. All good stories start with cocktails

196. “All is fair in love and beer. ”- Kurt Paradis

197. “Here’s to alcohol, the cause of — and solution to — all life’s problems.” ~ Homer Simpson

198. You are the piña to my colada

199. “(The Old Fashioned)… is a member of the cocktail trinity. ” – George Jean Nathan

200. “B.E.E.R = Brew. Enjoy. Empty. Repeat”

201. Save water. Drink alcohol

202. If you have to ask if it’s too early to drink champagne, you’re an amateur and we can’t be friends

203. Cocktails are the other vitamin C.

204. If you have to ask if it’s too early to drink champagne, you’re an amateur, and we can’t be friends

205. “Cheers to the freakin’ weekend.” — Rihanna

206. “Drink in the moment.”

207. A banana has 100 calories, and a vodka soda has 64. Choose wisely.

208. You can’t sip with us

209. Making pour decisions tonight

210. I have mixed drinks about feelings.

211. A love letter to cocktails

212. “Cheers to the freakin’ weekend.” — Rihanna, “Cheers (Drink to That)

213. Time flies when you’re having rum

214. First drink about it, then think about it

215. I always make time for cocktails.

216. “There cannot be good living where there is no good drinking. ” – Benjamin Franklin

217. When life screws you up, get yourself a screwdriver

218. Drinking before 10am makes you a pirate not an alcoholic

219. Cocktails are always a good idea

220. “I’d rather have a bottle in front of me than a frontal lobotomy.” ~ Dorothy Parker

221. There is nothing that a glass of cocktail cannot solve.

222. It’s not drinking alone if you dog is home

223. Born to rum.

224. Weekends are only complete with cocktails

225. “If life gives you lemons, make lemonade…and find someone whose life gave them vodka. ” – Ron White

226. Make yourself special by drinking well and more than others

227. “Sipping on sunshine.”

228. “Cheers to the weekend”

229. Whiskey me away

230. Yes, way rose.

231. “It’s 4:58 on Friday afternoon. Do you know where your margarita is?” — Amy Neftzger

232. I’m outdoorsy, meaning I like to drink cocktails on patios

233. Bottoms up

234. “Here’s to another round of laughter and good drinks”

235. Take a pitcher, it’ll last longer.

236. Always say yes to cocktails

237. “Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy. ” — Benjamin Franklin

238. When life screws you up get yourself a screwdriver

239. You’re the mint to my mojito

240. Just need a cocktail to make my mood good

241. If you want to be happy, worry less and drink more

242. I wish someone would look at me the same way I look at cocktails

243. “Happy hour o’clock.”

244. Being a beach lover is one of the things I got right

245. Some people wanted champagne and caviar when they should have had a beer and hot dogs

246. We go together like Fridays and happy hour.

247. If you don’t drink, how will your friends know that you love them at 2am?

248. “Raise a glass to good times and good drinks.”

249. “Making memories one drink at a time.”

250. “Here’s to alcohol, the rose-colored glasses of life.” – F. Scott Fitzgerald

251. My happiest hours include sunset and a boardwalk

252. The only real happy ending is the weekend

253. The inner soul of every girl out there demands a glass of bloody Mary

254. “Drink like you’re living your best life.”

255. “An ocean breeze puts a mind at ease.”

256. A Lady with a glass of cosmopolitan, defines Beauty with class

257. 24 hours in a day. 24 beers in a case. Coincidence? I think not

258. “How can you ever be bored on a boardwalk like this?”

259. “Do not allow children to mix drinks. It is unseemly and they use too much vermouth.” — Steve Allen

260. “Sip happens at happy hour.”

261. When life gives you lemons, slice them up and make a cocktail

262. Little Miss Martini

263. Champagne is always the answer

264. Don’t even ask, just pour me a drink

265. A party without champagne is just a meeting

266. Vine and dandy

267. If life gives you limes, make a margarita.

268. “I’m a better person when I’m drinking pińa coladas.”

269. “Let’s raise a toast to [insert occasion here].”

270. “I don’t have a drinking problem except when I can’t get a drink. ” – Tom Waits

271. “Always find time for the things and people who make you happy.”

272. “You say potato, I say vodka. ” —Karen Walker, Will & Grace

273. You’re the piña to my colada

274. Yes way Rosé!

275. I prefer my cocktails old-fashioned

276. “Cheers to a night well-drunk.”

277. “Everybody’s got to believe in something. I believe I’ll have another beer.” ~ W.C. Fields

278. Call me old-fashioned

279. Hear no evil, speak no evil, and you won’t be invited to cocktail parties.

280. Sip, sip, hooray!

281. “Tonight’s forecast? 99% of cocktails.”

282. In case of emergency, fill with vodka

283. Of course size matters, no one wants a small glass of wine

284. “I’m not really a social drinker. I would say it’s mostly work-related.”

285. “There’s always time for cocktails.”

286. Beer, if drunk in moderation, softens the temper, cheers the spirit and promotes health

287. Old Fashioned Kind of Love

288. “Step Aside coffee This is a Job for alcohol”

289. I don’t drink a cocktail, cocktail drinks me.

290. “Hear no evil, speak no evil, and you won’t be invited to cocktail parties. ” — Oscar Wilde

291. It’s time to wine down

292. Let’s drink about it

293. “Drinking Rum before 10am makes you a Pirate, not an Alcoholic. ” – Earl Dibbles Jr

294. I only drink a little, but when I do, I turn into another person, and that person drinks a lot

295. 2 best thing about Russia? It’s vodka and Moscow mule

296. “Hear no evil, speak no evil, and you won’t be invited to cocktail parties.” — Oscar Wilde

297. Hit me with your best shot.

298. Peace, love, and happy hour

299. Cocktails never let me down

300. “Cheers to a night full of good drinks, good friends, and good memories.”

301. It’s a cocktail o’clock

302. Life is short, order the cocktail

303. God has given you unlimited and countless happy hours, you just need to find and recognise them

304. “Rum is a flatterer, making fools and lunatics. ” – James Lendall Basford

305. Two best things about Russia? It’s vodka and Moscow mule

306. Drinking before 10 am makes you a pirate, not an alcoholic

307. “I spent half my money on gambling, alcohol, and wild women. The other half I wasted. ” — W. C. Fields

308. Snooze, booze, repeat

309. “Drink like there’s no tomorrow, because there isn’t.”

310. I love water. Especially frozen into ice cubes. Blended with tequila. I love margaritas

311. “Cocktails and good times, always.”

312. “When I read about the evils of drinking, I gave it up. Reading, that is.” – Henny Youngman

313. Girls often prefer cocktails over, Ahem, I guess you already know it.

314. “Whisky is liquid sunshine. ”- George Bernard Shaw

315. You want to hear to tale, go first grab a glass of cocktail

316. Tonight’s forecast? A 99% chance of cocktails.

317. Little Miss Can’t Turn Down A Cocktail

318. “I worked hard all week to put beer on this table.”

319. Tequila is cheaper than therapy.

320. It’s 5 o’clock somewhere.

321. “It is true that whiskey improves with age. The old I get, the more I like it.” — Ronnie Corbett

322. “I don’t have a drinking problem ‘cept when I can’t get a drink. ” ― Tom Waits

323. I need therapy, cocktail therapy.

324. “That’s what I do. I drink and I know things. ” —Tyrion Lannister, Game of Thrones

325. “It’s beginning to look a lot like cocktails.”

326. Girls just wanna have cocktails

327. “Cocktails are just hugs in a glass.”

328. “Mix it up, it’s the spice of life”

329. Happy hour views

330. “B.E.E.R = Brew. Enjoy. Empty. Repeat.”

331. She had a cocktail in her hand and confetti in her hair

332. “Alcohol may be man’s worst enemy, but the bible says love your enemy.” ~ Frank Sinatra

333. I worked hard all week to put beer on this table

334. Find me at the counter of cocktails in bars

335. First drink, then let’s think about it.

336. “Cheers to new friends and good times”

337. The best way to thank for a lovely moment is to enjoy it fully

338. There’s no problem a cocktail can’t solve

339. “Here’s to a night filled with good drinks and good memories”

340. Limit yourself to 3-4 hashtags

341. “I do believe it’s time for another peachy adventure.”

342. Knock Knock, it’s cocktail o’clock!

343. “Only, in Haiti, I realized, is it possible to drink rum and haggle with a god. ” – Wade Davis

344. “Sip, sip, hooray”

345. Pretty fly for a Mai Tai!

346. A love letter to Old Fashions

347. Good vibes happen at happy hour.

348. We don’t trust camels or anything that can go a week without a drink.

349. “There cannot be good living where there is no good drinking.” – Benjamin Franklin

350. It’s finally Friday, let’s pop the champagne!

351. Political party? No. Cocktail party? Yes

352. Beer. Lime. & Sunshine

353. Drink triple, see double, act single

354. “Take time to coast (and toast).”

355. Alcohol is not the answer. Alcohol is the question. Yes is the answer

356. Fresh for your enjoyment

357. Can’t stop to chat. I’m late for a meeting at wine o’clock

358. “My cocktail = Beer. Lime. & Sunshine.”

359. I followed my heart, it led me to the bar

360. “A drink a day keeps reality at bay” – Unknown

361. Brunch so hard mimosas wanna find me

362. When life throws lemons catch them and make a cocktail

363. “Raise a glass to new beginnings.”

364. “Darling, every hour is ‘happy hour’ when you are fabulous.”

365. How Merlot can you go?

366. “Cocktails and dreams.”

367. Wine stains on my glass mean I went to a virtual wine tasting

368. Don’t think about the cocktail. Drink the cocktail

369. Everybody’s got to believe in something. I believe I’ll have another drink

370. “Cocktails and good food, a match made in heaven”

371. You’re not drunk if you can lie on the floor without holding on.

372. “Cocktails and laughter, the perfect recipe”

373. “Reality is an illusion that occurs due to lack of alcohol.” ~ Anonymous

374. Democratic party, Republican party, Cocktail party

375. We all deserve an alcoholiday

376. “Vodka does not ease back pain. But it does get your mind off it. ” – Fuzzy Zoeller

377. You can never resist the charm of a cocktail. #cocktailcharm

378. A party without cocktails is just a meeting

379. Always find time for the things and people who make you happy.

380. “The relationship between a Russian and a bottle of vodka is almost mystical. ” – Richard Owen

381. Take life with a grain of salt, a slice of lime, and a shot of tequila.

382. “Raise a glass to new beginnings”

383. When I read about the evils of drinking, I gave it up. Reading, that is.

384. Once upon a time, in a cocktail bar…

385. “Cocktails and good company, the perfect mix.”

386. On cloud wine!

387. “Cheers to a beautiful [insert day/night here]”

388. Bring on the bubbly.

389. “Too much of anything is bad, but too much good whiskey is barely enough. ” – Mark Twain

390. If you like Piña Coladas and getting caught in the rain…

391. “Here’s to another round”

392. You had me at “happy hour. ”

393. “Here’s to a night filled with laughter, good drinks, and unforgettable memories”

394. “I would rather have a free bottle in front of me than a pre-frontal lobotomy” ~ Dean Martin

395. “Here’s to a night filled with drinks, dancing, and fun”

396. “I’m in need of liquid therapy” – Unknown

397. Pretty fly for a Mai Tai

398. “Don’t think about the cocktail, drink cocktail.”

399. This senorita needs a margarita

400. “When I read about the evils of drinking, I gave it up. Reading, that is.” — Henny Youngman

401. “Raise a glass to the moment.”

402. You can never resist the charm of a cocktail

403. “Sipping on happiness.”

404. Every hour is happy hour if you’re dedicated enough

405. It’s plain to see, we’re mint to be

406. Mimosas are a good source of vitamin C

407. Friday nights are incomplete without the cocktail.

408. Gin and bear it

409. “Cheers to a night of endless cocktails and endless fun.”

410. Don’t worry, don’t cry, drink vodka, and fly

411. “Happiest among all the hours.”

412. Relationship status: in love with cocktails

413. “Sipping on summer vibes.”

414. “I need therapy, cocktail therapy.”

415. Thank you from the bottom of my glass

416. Happy hour views.

417. “When I read about the evils of drinking, I gave it up. Reading, that is. ” – Henny Youngman

418. “Candy is dandy, but liquor is quicker. ” — Ogden Nash

419. “I always make time for cocktails.”

420. But first, cocktails.

421. “Happy hour views.”

422. “Do not allow children to mix drinks. It is unseemly and they use too much vermouth.” – Steve Allen

423. “Surround yourself with people who are more excited about your birthday than you are.”

424. “Alcohol may be man’s worst enemy, but the bible says love your enemy. ” — Frank Sinatra

425. “Drinking for the moment”

426. “I never go jogging. It makes me spill my martini. ” — George Burns

427. “Shake it off, drink it up.”

428. Do not allow children to mix drinks. It is unseemly, and they use too much vermouth.

429. Happy hour or better call it a cocktail hour

430. It’s a cocktail o clock

431. My only regret in life is that I didn’t drink enough champagne

432. The weekend called, she’s on her way bringing cocktails

433. “Trust me you can dance”- Vodka

434. Tequila is cheaper than therapy

435. I’ll be ready in a prosecco

436. Today’s good mood is brought to you by cocktails

437. Yes, way rosé

438. “Here’s to alcohol, the rose-colored glasses of life.” — F. Scott Fitzgerald

439. Friends don’t let friends go thirsty.

440. “Drinking for the love of it”

441. My friends speak of my drinking…. but they know not of my thirst

442. But first, cocktails

443. I’m in a good place right now. Not emotionally, I’m just in a bar.

444. Good times and cocktail limes

445. Just a sip to help me un-wine

446. Bring me the best cocktail in the town

447. Life is better by the beach

448. The best kind of alcohol is: a lot

449. Kids drink beer. Real men go for pitchers

450. Party now, worry later

451. Finish your day sparkling

452. The Vod Squad

453. “Friday called; she is on her way and she is also bringing wine with her.”

454. “Sipping on sweet dreams.”

455. Behind every great night is a cocktail

456. Always find time for the things and people who make you happy

457. Keep it short, sweet, and to the point!

458. “The only cocktail really to rival the martini and its variants. ” – Kingsley Amis

459. “Drink happy thoughts.”

460. “Go where the wifi is weak and the rum is strong.”

461. I’m a better person when I’m drinking Piña Coladas.

462. “Making memories, one cocktail at a time”

463. “I have mixed drinks about feelings” – Unknown

464. “Beer, it’s the best damn drink in the world. ” —Jack Nicholson

465. Use descriptive and creative language to describe the taste, smell, and appearance of the drink

466. Give your taste buds a burst of sweet and sour mix #sweetandsourmojito

467. Cocktail are way cheaper than therapy

468. “A party without champagne is just a meeting.”

469. In need of liquid therapy

470. “It is true that whiskey improves with age. The older I get, the more I like it. ” – Ronnie Corbett

471. Weekend forecast, 100% chance of beer

472. “Be happy for this moment.”

473. I’d give up cocktails, but I’m no quitter

474. “Rosé all day.”

475. “Twinkle, twinkle, little star, point us to the nearest bar."

476. “Vodka is kind of a hobby. ” —Betty White

477. I can’t drink orange juice neat, please pass the vodka

478. Thank you, from the bottom of my glass

479. It’s wine o clock

480. Why limit happy to an hour?

481. A cocktail a day keeps the worries away.

482. You’re not drunk if you can lie on the floor without holding on

483. As endless as the ocean, as timeless as the tides

484. It’s 5 o’clock somewhere

485. “Drink responsibly, but have fun.”

486. I don’t care if someone calls me old-fashioned

487. Stop trying to make everybody happy. You’re not a cocktail

488. Enjoy a taste of heaven.

489. Will you accept this Rosé?

490. Cocktails are always a good idea.

491. I’d rather be someone’s shot of whiskey than everyone’s cup of tea.

492. “Too much of anything is bad, but too much good whiskey is barely enough.” – Mark Twain

493. Happy hour is the best hour

494. “There comes a time in every woman’s life when the only thing that helps is a glass of champagne.”

495. The more I think about you the more I need to fill my empty glass of cocktail

496. Trying to make protein shakes, but they keep coming out like margaritas

497. Words can’t espresso how much I love this martini

498. Cocktails are the key to my heart

499. There is nothing that a cocktail cannot solve.

500. Salt, tequila, lime. Repeat

501. “Wasted away again in Margaritaville. ” —Jimmy Buffett

502. ”A medium vodka dry martini, with a slice of lemon peel. Shaken and not stirred. ” – Ian Fleming

503. Liquid calories don’t count

504. The more I think about you, the more I need to drink

505. Friday called. She’s on her way, bringing cocktails!

506. Champagne kisses

507. Some call it self-confidence – I call it cocktails.

508. Happiest among all the hours.

509. Alcohol you later

510. I love the umbrella hanging on the top of the cocktail.

511. At times illusion is better than reality, at least you’re getting unlimited cocktails over there.

512. Enjoying life one cocktail at a time

513. Include a strong call to action

514. “Vodka is like water, but with consequences. ” – Tom Rachman

515. Darling, every hour is ‘happy hour’ when you are fabulous.

516. Save water and drink cocktails.

517. I have mixed drinks about feelings

518. “Drink Up Me Hearties, Yo Ho!” – Captain Jack Sparrow

519. “I’m in need of liquid therapy”

520. Alcohol is the liquid version of Photoshop.

521. Use the caption to showcase your bartending skills

522. I’m a gin-nie in a bottle

523. A cocktail a day keeps the worries away

524. “Drinking for the journey”

525. If you want to start your love story in an amazing way, start it with a cocktail

526. “Drinking for the ‘gram”

527. Want to make me yours? Offer me some cocktails.

528. Alcohol you later.

529. “Life is too short for plain water”

530. I’m a better person when I’m drinking pińa coladas

531. Searching for the best cocktail in town

532. The cocktail is the best drink

533. “Darling, every hour is ‘happy hour when you are fabulous.”

534. “Gonna party like it’s my birthday…’cause it is.”

535. Use emojis and have fun with them

536. “I drink too much. Last time I gave a urine sample there was an olive in it. ” – Rodney Dangerfield

537. When I read about the evils of drinking I gave up reading

538. “Cocktails are more loyal than anyone else.. at least they never let u down.”

539. “Time flies when you are having a cocktail.”

540. A drink a day keeps reality at bay

541. You had me at Merlot

542. “I’m in a good place right now. I’m on the beach.”

543. “Hear no evil, speak no evil, and you won’t be invited to cocktail parties. ” – Oscar Wilde

544. Too much of anything is bad, but too many cocktails are just right

545. Cocktails always gets high on girls

546. Step aside coffee. This is a job for cocktails.

547. “Raise a glass to [insert accomplishment here]”

548. “Cocktails and good company, the ultimate combination.”

549. Enjoy a taste of heaven

550. Champagne is like duct tape. It fixes everything

551. Save water, drink wine

552. Beer to many more cheers

553. In alcohol’s defense, I’ve done some pretty dumb sh*t while completely sober too

554. Monday, nothing a cocktail can’t fix

555. Let the good times Aperol

556. Girls just wanna have cocktails.

557. Do you get deja-brew?

558. It’s wine o’clock somewhere

559. “Let’s make this a recurring meeting.”

560. Cocktail thoughts.

561. “Raise a glass to life’s little victories”

562. A party without cocktails is just a meeting.

563. “A man’s true character comes out when he’s drunk.”

564. “Let’s make this a night to remember.”

565. Let’s pop bottles

566. Step aside coffee. This is a job for alcohol

567. That’s what I do, I drink and I know things

568. Happy hour o’clock.

569. I need therapy, cocktail therapy

570. “Don’t even ask, just poor me a drink.”

571. There cannot be good living where there is no good drinking.

572. “Drinking to forget, but mostly to remember”

573. “Tequila for my soul”

574. “Sipping on something sweet.”

575. “Shaken, not stirred”

576. The inner soul of every girl out there demands a glass of bloody Mary.

577. There’s always time for cocktails

578. Trust me, you can dance – Vodka

579. “Girls often prefer cocktails over, Ahem I guess u already know it.”

580. “Work is the curse of the drinking class. ” – Oscar Wilde

581. “There cannot be good living where there is no good drinking.” — Benjamin Franklin

582. Do cocktails count towards my eight glasses of water a day?

583. “Let’s raise a glass to [insert milestone here]”

584. “Strong women need strong drinks.”

585. “Party now, adult later.”

586. Front-load the most important information

587. “I exercise self-control and never touch a beverage stronger than gin before breakfast. ”—W. C. Fields

588. Gin me baby one more time

589. Drink happy thoughts.

590. “When life throws lemon catch them and make a cocktail.”

591. “It’s finally Friday, let’s pop the champagne!”

592. I didn’t choose the thug life. The thug life chose me

593. I enjoy long romantic walks toward the bar.

594. “Looks like you have a lot on your mind. Wanna drink about it?”

595. “Drink like you’re on vacation.”

596. Move over, coffee. Today is a day for cocktails

597. “Too much of anything is bad, but too many cocktails are just right.”

598. “Sipping on something sweet”

599. Political party? NO, cocktail party? YES

600. “That’s what my perfume would smell like, margarita and vodka. ” – Chelsea Handler

601. “Friday called, she’s on her way bringing cocktails!”

602. I’ve got 99 problems, and this cocktail solves them all

603. When I read about the evils of drinking, I gave up reading.

604. “Drink up, it’s [insert day of the week here]”

605. Dying for the cocktail

606. Great minds, drink a like

607. How can you ever be bored on a boardwalk like this?

608. “Cocktails and conversations, the perfect match”

609. I prefer my cocktails old-fashioned.

610. “Friday nights are incomplete without the cocktail.”

611. Sip me baby, one more time

612. A banana has 105 calories, a vodka soda has 64. Choose wisely

613. “Why do I drink Champagne for breakfast? Doesn’t everyone?” —Noel Coward

614. Yes, size matters! No one wants a small cocktail!

615. “Drink triple, see double, act single” – Unknown

616. “Do not allow children to mix drinks. It is unseemly and they use too much vermouth. ” – Steve Allen

617. In a relationship with a cocktail.

618. I’d rather be someone’s shot of whiskey than everyone’s cup of tea

619. My cocktail = Beer. Lime. & Sunshine

620. A drink a day keeps reality at bay.

621. The lower the latitude, the better the attitude

622. “An intelligent man is sometimes forced to be drunk to spend time with his fools.” — Ernest Hemingway

623. To me “drink responsibly” means don’t spill it!

624. “Great love affairs start with a cocktail.”

625. “Cocktails and laughter, the perfect way to unwind.”

626. Champagne is like duct tape, It fixes everything

627. I need a HUGE cocktail.

628. “My friends speak of my drinking…. but they know not of my thirst.”

629. “What whiskey will not cure, there is no cure for. ” – Irish Proverb

630. “Let’s drink to that”

631. I want my toes in the sand and a cocktail in my hand

632. “Cocktails and good vibes, always.”

633. Step aside coffee! This is a job for alcohol!

634. A taste of heaven

635. Work is the curse of the drinking class.

636. “Let’s cheers to life.”

637. “Drinking for the love of adventure”

638. I got 9 problems and cocktails solve every one of them.

639. She has a cocktail in her hand and confetti in her hair.

640. “Wine is sunlight, held together by water.”

641. 2 best things about Russia? It’s vodka and Moscow mule.

642. I’ve got some bad gin-tentions

643. Surround yourself with people who are more excited about your birthday than you are

644. Sometimes, all you need is a mojito

645. “Twinkle, twinkle, little star, point us to the nearest bar.”

646. “Cocktails and relaxation, the ultimate escape.”

647. “It’s thirsty Thursday.”

648. The two best things about Russia? Vodka and Moscow mules

649. Drink cocktails as often as you can

650. If life gives you limes, make a margarita

651. Just here for the views and the cocktails

652. You’re the maraschino cherry on top

653. “There’s naught, no doubt, so much the spirit calms as rum and true religion. ” – Lord Byron

654. Wine + Dinner = Winner

655. “Let’s drink to the good life.”

656. “Cheers to the freakin’ weekend. ” — Rihanna, “Cheers (Drink to That)”

657. B. E. E. R = Brew. Enjoy. Empty. Repeat

658. An ocean breeze puts a mind at ease

659. Hey, what’s the time? It’s wine o clock

660. When life hands you lemons, bust out the Tequila and salt!

661. “I never go jogging. It makes me spill my martini.” — George Burns

662. Whenever you’re feeling down, the bar’s always open

663. Keep calm and grab a cocktail

664. “Never chase anything but drinks and bars.”

665. I don’t drink a cocktail. The cocktail drinks me

666. Knock knock, it’s cocktail o’clock

667. Happiest among all the hours

668. You had me at “cocktails. ”

669. Time flies when you’re having a cocktail

670. Alcohol is the anesthesia by which we endure the operation of life

671. It’s wine o’clock

672. Cocktail thoughts

673. What did the old fashioned say to the glass of whiskey? You’re neat

674. No amount of physical contact could match the healing powers of a well-made cocktail.

675. “Bottoms Up”

676. Keep calm and make yourself a cocktail

677. Let’s drink about it.

678. Cocktails are more loyal than anyone else… at least they never let you down.

679. There are two kinds of people I don’t trust: people who don’t drink and people who collect stickers.

680. “I love the umbrella hanging on the top of the cocktail.”

681. “Move over, coffee. Today is a day for champagne.”

682. “Drink like there’s no tomorrow.”

683. “Everybody’s got to believe in something. I believe I’ll have another beer. ”― W. C. Fields

684. I don’t care if someone calls me old-fashioned.

685. “The problem with the world is that everyone is a few drinks behind. ” – Humphrey Bogart

686. Choose happy…hour

687. “To remove blood stains from your conscience try frozen margaritas. ” – Demetri Martin

688. Why limit happiness to an hour?

689. Livin’ La Vida Vodka

690. It’s not as giant as James’ peach, but I like mine just fine.

691. “Long Live Happy Hour!”

692. “Toasting to a brighter tomorrow”

693. “Take a pitcher, it’ll last longer.”

694. “Drink like you mean it.”

695. “They say as soon as you have to cut down on your drinking, you have a drinking problem.”

696. I stopped drinking for good. Now I drink for evil

697. “Let’s make a toast to [insert event here]”

698. “I could never in a hundred summers get tired of this.”

699. Keep your gin up

700. “It is true that whiskey improves with age. The old I get, the more I like it.” – Ronnie Corbett

701. Cocktails brings you the best taste swings.

702. When life throws lemons, catch them and make a cocktail

703. Move over, coffee. Today is a day for cocktails.

704. Technically, it’s not drinking alone if a bartender is there

705. I’m in need of liquid therapy.

706. “If life gives you lemons, make lemonade…and find someone whose life gave them vodka.” – Ron White

707. “Girls just wanna have cocktails.”

708. When I read about the evils of drinking, I gave up reading

709. Life without you is un-beer-able

710. Tonight’s forecast: 100% chance of cocktails

711. Don’t even ask. Just pour me a drink

712. Pop, fizz, clink

713. You can never resist the charm of a cocktail.

714. “I love scotch. Scotchy, scotch, scotch. Here it goes down, down into my belly.”

715. Give your followers a tip or piece of advice related to making or enjoying the drink

716. Some call it arrogant; I call it confident

717. Use the caption to promote a happy hour or special offer

718. “Seen through the gold of old Scotch, life seems more beautiful. ” — Pierre Souvestre

719. “Cocktails and laughter, the cure for any mood.”

720. “Why limit happy to an hour?”

721. “Choose happy…hour.”

722. “Take time to coast (and toast).” – Unknown

723. I always make time for cocktails

724. A pineapple a day keeps the worries away

725. “Sipping on paradise.”

726. I hope to arrive to my death late, in love, and a little drunk

727. I don’t have a drinking problem except when I can’t get a drink

728. Have a cocktail and get up on the dance floor.

729. I could never in a hundred summers get tired of this

730. Have a cocktail and get up on the dance floor

731. “Cocktails, because sometimes soda is just not enough”

732. “Drink with a view.”

733. “Best ideas come while sipping rum.” – Pavol Kazimir

734. Drink responsibly: don’t spill any

735. There is nothing that a glass of cocktail cannot solve

736. “My office happy hour is whatever hour I leave the office.”

737. Sip happens

738. “We go together like Fridays and happy hour.”

739. Pitcher-perfect

740. “Work is the curse of the drinking class.” – Oscar Wilde

741. “If wine is fruit, then vodka must be a vegetable. ” – Jann Arden

742. “Drink more, worry less.”

743. Rosé all day

744. Long Live Happy Hour!

745. It’s never too early for a cocktail

746. Never chase anything but drinks and dreams.

747. And I drink to myself, what a wonderful world…

748. The drunken man speaks the honest truth

749. We’re all addicted to something that takes away the pain

750. My relationship to whiskey is on the rocks

751. I make wine disappear. What’s your superpower?

752. “Have rum; I mean, have fun. Don’t overdose. Cheers. ” – Vikrmn, Corpkshetra

753. Save water, drink cocktails

754. I do believe it’s time for another peachy adventure

755. Cheers to many more years (and many more beers)

756. Behind every great night is a cocktail.

757. If you want to hear the tale, go first grab a glass of cocktail

758. May your day and your cocktails be colorful

759. Cocktails are more loyal than anyone else. . at least they never let you down

760. When life throws lemons, catch them and make a cocktail.

761. Sip, sip hooray!

762. Happy hour o’clock

763. Let me be your Ginderella

764. “Let the evening be gin.”

765. Great love affairs start with a cocktail

766. “Cocktails and good music, the perfect soundtrack for a good night.”

767. God has given you unlimited and countless happy hours. You just need to find and recognize them

768. A cocktail love affair

769. Do you drink?”. “Of course, I just said I was a writer. ”- Stephen King

770. Girls just wanna have rum

771. “A good margarita, a good red wine, I like expensive alcohol, but not a lot of it. ” – Denise Richards

772. When life screws you, go get yourself a screwdriver

773. Vodka is just awesome water

774. “Raise a glass to life’s simple pleasures”

775. Be happy for this moment

776. Stir Mix a lot

777. Use the caption to highlight the unique selling points of the establishment where the drink was enjoyed

778. “Why is the rum always gone? …Oh, that’s why. ” – Captain Jack Sparrow

779. “Clear alcohols are for rich women on diets. ” —Ron Swanson, Parks and Recreation

780. If you like piña coladas, and getting caught in the rain

781. “Cheers to good vibes”

782. “Why limit happy to an hour?” – W. C Fields

783. Cocktails always get high on girls

784. “I cook with wine, sometimes I even add it to the food.”

785. “In wine there is wisdom, in beer there is Freedom, in water there is bacteria.” ~ Benjamin Franklin

786. I could never in a hundred summers get tired of this.

787. “Cheers to a new week”

788. Cheers to the freakin’ weekend.

789. No working during drinking hours

790. “Happy hour is where my coworkers turn into work besties.”

791. Call me old–fashioned

792. Drink cocktails as much as you can.

793. “Drink cocktails and save the water.”

794. Mojitos, mo problems

795. “Raise a glass to love, laughter, and good drinks.”

796. “Sipping on sunshine”

797. If You want to hear the tale, go first and grab a glass of cocktail.

798. He was a wise man who invented beer

799. A balanced diet is a cocktail in each hand

800. “Everybody’s got to believe in something. I believe I’ll have another beer. ” — W. C. Fields

801. “Rum is tonic that clarifies the vision, and sets things in true perspective. ” ― Brian D’Ambrosio

802. Don’t even ask, just pour me a drink.

803. Sippin’ and chillin’

804. Technically it’s not drinking alone if the bartender is there

805. If gives you lemons, make lemonade…and find someone whose life gave them vodka.

806. Everybody’s got to believe in something. I believe I’ll have another beer

807. Sobriety is not in my vodka-bulary

808. Passports and pineapples

809. “Here’s to alcohol, the rose colored glasses of life.” ~ F. Scott Fitzgerald

810. Be a pineapple: stand tall, wear a crown, and be sweet on the inside

811. Good vibes happen at happy hour

812. “Don’t even ask, just pour me a drink.”

813. Drinking alone is the beginning stage of alcoholism

814. “Cocktails and good company, the perfect duo”

815. Sip me baby one more time…

816. You are the mint to my mojito

817. It’s beginning to look a lot like cocktails.

818. Soup of the day: vodka

819. “Let’s drink to love.”

820. If you like piña coladas, and getting caught in the rain…

821. Drinks well with others

822. Friday called, she’s on her way bringing cocktails!

823. “Abstainer: a weak person who yields to the temptation of denying himself a pleasure.” ~ Amrose Bierce

824. “If liking Katy Perry and drinking margaritas is gay, then who wants to be straight?!” – James Franco

825. Of course, size matters. No one wants a small glass of wine

826. “Cheers to [insert holiday here]”

827. Cocktails always get high on girls.

828. I need different types of cocktail.

829. Drink cocktails as much as you can

830. “One tequila, two tequila, three tequila, floor.”

831. “Happy hour? …

832. “Be a pineapple: stand tall, wear a crown, and be sweet on the inside.”

833. “Party now, adult later.” – Unknown

834. Sip back and relax

835. “Yes, way rosé “Be happy for this moment.”

836. “Pretty women make us BUY beer. Ugly women make us DRINK beer.” ~ Al Bundy

837. I don’t get drunk. I just get less classy and more fun

838. Cocktails bring you the best taste swings

839. “Espresso martinis, because no one should have to choose between coffee and alcohol. ” – Unknown

840. You can’t buy happiness. But you can buy yourself a cute cocktail, and that’s basically the same thing

841. Bring me the best cocktail in town.

842. Hangovers are temporary, drunk stories are forever

843. “She has a cocktail in her hand and confetti in her hair.” – Kate Spade

844. “Cocktails and good music, the perfect soundtrack”

845. Friends don’t let friends go thirsty

846. Twinkle, twinkle, little star, point us to the nearest bar

847. I negroni imagine

848. Thank you from the bottom of my glass.

849. If life gives you limes, make margarita

850. “I love my coworkers from my head to mojitos.”

851. “Why limit happy to an hour?” – W.C Fields

852. Cocktails are not the answer. Cocktails are the Question. Yes is the answer.

853. I NEED A HUGe cocktail

854. Let the evening be gin

855. Don’t think about the cocktail, drink the cocktail.

856. “Alcohol you later.”

857. Cocktails brings you the best taste swings

858. Every hour deserves to be happy

859. The best cocktails are the ones we drink with friends.

860. “Raise a glass to good friends and good times”

861. It’s 4:59 on Friday afternoon. Do you know where your margarita is?

862. Magic words: “let’s get cocktails. ”

863. “Wine not?”

864. “Cocktails and good food, a feast for the senses.”

865. I prefer my espresso in a martini

866. I live for thirsty Thursday

867. Happy hour vibes

868. “Democratic party, Republican party, Cocktail party.”

869. I wanted to make a joke about martinis, but it was too dry

870. Happy hour mode

871. “Happy hour is necessary on days when meetings could have been emails.”

872. “There’s no absolutes in life, only vodka. ” – Mick Jagger

873. Use hashtags to describe the ingredients or flavor profile of the drink

874. “There is nothing which a glass of cocktail cannot solve.”

875. “A drunk man’s words are a sober man’s thoughts. ”- Steve Fergosi

876. “Toasting to [insert occasion here]”

877. “Cheers to another year older, another year wiser, and another year of good drinks.”

878. Yes way rosé

879. “Best ideas come while sipping rum. ” – Pavol Kazimir

880. Too much of anything is bad, but too many cocktails is just right

881. Cocktails are always the answer

882. Catch me live at my happy hours

883. Life and beer are very similar, chill for best results

884. If u visit New York someday, don’t ever forget to try the Manhattan cocktail

885. Keep calm and give yourself a cocktail

886. “Raise a glass to the weekend.”

887. Drink happy thoughts

888. “Alcohol may be man’s worst enemy, but the bible says love your enemy.” — Frank Sinatra

889. “Never chase anything but drinks and dreams.”

890. “Alcohol is the anesthesia by which we endure the operation of life.”

891. I’m in a good place right now. I’m on the beach

892. Old Fashions: The Granddaddy of Cocktails

893. At times illusion is better than reality, at least you’re getting unlimited cocktail over there

894. Share a story or memory associated with the drink

895. I drink to make other people more interesting

896. Don’t tell me you miss me… tell me you’re outside with champagne

897. Hakuna mimosa: it means it’s brunch time

898. You are the Piña to my Colada.

899. It’s happy hour o’clock

900. One drink away from telling everyone what I think

901. “Sipping my way to happiness”

902. “Olive a good martini with my work besties.”

903. Dope days, chill nights, good company, and mellow vibes

904. Hakuna ma’ vodka.

905. “Take a seat, grab a treat.”

906. “Here’s to alcohol, the rose-colored glasses of life. ” – F. Scott Fitzgerald

907. Some want to be wined. I want to be margarita’d

908. “Shaken, not stirred. ” —James Bond

909. Only count the happy hours

910. “Drink responsibly, but have fun”

911. “Margaritas are my favorite. And my fiance makes them just perfect. ” – Garance Dore

912. “Cocktail hour, anytime”

913. Go where the wifi is weak and the rum is strong

914. Call me old-fashioned.

915. Bad and boozy

916. I like it dirty

917. When life gets too salty, add a little tequila and lime

918. Strong women need strong drinks

919. Twinkle, twinkle, little star, point us to the nearest bar.

920. I prefer Tom Collins over Tom Cruise

921. God has given you unlimited and countless happy hours, you just need to find and recognise them.

922. Want to make me yours? Offer me some cocktails

923. Don’t cry over spilled milk… it could’ve been a cocktail.

924. A lady with a glass of cosmopolitan defines beauty with class

925. Margarita over senorita, any time

926. A slice of lemon and glass of cocktail, tell me a better love story than this?

927. Sip sip, hooray!

928. Happy hour? I prefer to make every hour happy

929. I need different types of the cocktail

930. Know when to give up and have a margarita

931. “They talk of my drinking but never my thirst. ” – Scottish Proverb

932. No working during drinking hours.

933. Long Live Happy Hour

934. “Fresh for your enjoyment.”

935. “Champagne kisses. ”

936. “I have mixed drinks about feelings”

937. “I drink to make other people more interesting.”

938. “When life throws lemon catch them and make a cocktail.“

939. “Step aside coffee! This is a job for alcohol!”

940. You can’t buy happiness, but you can buy beer, and that’s kind of the same thing

941. “Too much of anything is bad, but too much good whiskey is barely enough. ” —Mark Twain

942. “Trust me, you can dance.” – Vodka.

943. I love you from my head to mojitos

944. You can never resist the charm of a good cocktail

945. My happy place

946. “Alcohol is the anesthesia by which we endure the operation of life. ” – George Bernard Shaw

947. “Raise a glass to new adventures”

948. Wine not?

949. A friend of wine is a friend of mine

950. I need a little drinky drink

951. Make happy hour last all day.

952. Shaken, not stirred

953. Cocktail, because no great story ever started with someone eating a salad

954. Time flies when you are having a cocktail.

955. “Red Rum is the greatest thing on four legs since Pegasus. ” – Jean Rook

956. Take time to coast (and toast)

957. It is true that whiskey improves with age. The old I get, the more I like it.

958. Keep calm because it’s happy hour!

959. At times, an illusion is better than reality. At least you’re getting an unlimited cocktail over there

960. My friends speak of my drinking…. But they do not know of my thirst.

961. May all your days be filled with umbrella drinks.

962. In a relationship with a cocktail

963. Hakuna ma’ vodka

964. “Everything happens for a reason.”

965. Take a pitcher, it’ll last longer

966. “If you like piña coladas, and getting caught in the rain…” – Rupert Holmes, Escape

967. “That’s what I do, I drink and I know things.”

968. “She has a cocktail in her hand and confetti in her hair. ” – Kate Spade

969. “Alcohol may be man’s worst enemy, but the bible says love your enemy.”

970. Gluten free, dairy free, fat free, I love this champagne diet

971. Sometimes, alcohol is the answer

972. The World’s First Classic Cocktail

973. “Drink triple, see double, act single.”

974. It’s strange how eight glasses of water a day seems impossible. But eight cocktails don’t.

975. “The problem with some people is that when they aren’t drunk they’re sober.” ~ William Butler Yeats

976. May all your days be filled with umbrella drinks

977. Heres to alcohol, the rose-colored glasses of life.

978. Everything happens for a reisling

979. It’s time to bring the mojito

980. “Raise a glass to adventure.”

981. Two wrongs don’t make a right. But two margaritas usually do

982. It’s a cocktail o’clock.

983. We go together like Fridays and happy hour

984. An intelligent man is sometimes forced to be drunk to spend time with his fools.

985. The best kind of alcohol is… A lot.

986. Alcohol maybe man’s worst enemy, but the bible says love your enemy

987. “I’m in need of liquid therapy.”

988. “Cheers to another round of good vibes.”

989. “An intelligent man is sometimes forced to be drunk to spend time with his fools.”

990. “Cocktails and good friends, a match made in heaven.”

991. Alcohol may be men worst enemy, but the bible says love your enemy.

992. Cocktails are way cheaper than therapy.

993. “Keep calm because it’s happy hour!”

994. Tonight’s forecast: 100% chance of dark n stormy

995. “I don’t drink a cocktail, cocktail drinks me.“

996. “If life gives you limes, make margaritas.” – Jimmy Buffett

997. “Cocktails, because sometimes beer is just not enough”

998. To beer, or not to beer, that is a silly question

999. I wish someone would look at me the same way I look at cocktails.

1000. “I work until beer o’clock. ” —Stephen King